t m i

This maybe t.m.i. but, I want to share, so whatever.

I live in a studio apartment with my lover.

Because it's just my lover and I; I pee with the bathroom door open. And this one time I was finishing up and I looked over and I see my dogs. They were both peering over the corner of the wall looking at me with their heads cocked to the side. Looking very curious at me as if to say 'what are you doing?'

They make me smile and keep me happy.

They are silly and sweet.

They get so very EXCITED!

But so very good.

They may need some obedient training

(well I need the training but that is something else)

But they are so very good; most of the time!

The other thing that maybe t.m.i. is

I have gas.

I have so much gas.

And it hurts!

So I let it out.

I think it could be my meds.

Sometimes it comes at inappropriate times.

And I think it's funny.

Like during a quite moment in a movie or show.

My gas starts to hurts me and I need to let it out.

So, I do...and then well, I laugh...a lot!

Then my lover looks over at me because I just ruined the moment.

And I can't help it, it's just so funny!

So I laugh!

Secret wish for the day: To actually get pictures of my doggies being so cute and not missing the moment by just seconds.

things that make me smile

My lover!......................................Road trips!

Food and snacks!...........................Taking pictures!

Making the baby laugh!...................Watching the dogs play!

Getting to hold the little one!..........Being able to just sit down and

veg out with the television! Getting overly excited about something

that I have seen and my lover caves! Thinking about all the places I

want to go to and planning on how to get there! I have this pink

chair that is big enough for Bella and I to sit in and Bella gets

to help me writ my blog, facebook games, or just surf the

web! Taking vacations with just my lover and I, and

maybe the dogs too! Learning new ways to make

jewelry! Sitting at home watching a movie with

my lover! Being with my family an my

friends! Watching my lover acted like

a dork! Watching the waves on the

beach! Date night! Creating!

Drawing! Smiling!

Love!

Secret with of the day: A rice bowl from Jack in the Box!

AWE! Father-Daughter!

I saw these two on Ellen today and they are just the cutest!

She is the sweetest little girl!

I want songs and a prayer before bed when we have a kid!

Or kids whatever happens.

This duo makes my heart melt!

I just love it!!

Secret wish of the day: To make a child as humble as this little one!

Sanity

I know things are hard for us right now but things will pick up.

It will happen.

We will make it happen.

The things that keep sane while my head makes me absolutely mad

are my crazy husband, the occasional family or friend thing, and the dogs.

While facebook and netflix can help me drowned out the stress of my life my everyday life,

they don't help me feel better.

I like my job but that can be a stesser in itself and that's not much help.

School was a bust this semester because of financial aid.

So I go out when I can, and my lover makes me laugh everyday!

Which is good too cause I usually cough up and out some green crap!

And Yes before I did say dogs, lol it's not a typo it is a new decision.

My lover found a small dog and we just couldn't leave him.

We tried to find his home but couldn't, and we tried to give him to the rescue that we got Bella from but she changed her number.

And now he is growing on us, GREAT!

It's so awesome being dog lovers. :)

But this comes at a time when we are trying to find a different place to live so it's going to working out. We have also named him....so ya! lol we are stuck with him....heehee.

I don't know, he is cute and Bella loves him.

She loves her Buddy.

In other news I am feeling the need to start working on a creative outlet for myself. Just not sure yet which thing I want to start.

I have also been trying to figure out how to make our lives work around getting the careers we want. My lover wants to be a Firefighter and I want to be a Physical Therapist.

I've been watching the news the last few days and it is just so hard to believe what is going on in Japan. All of the damage is so hard for me to wrap my head around. I wish the best to them in fixing and rebuilding their lives and their land.

The craziest video I have seen was from a friends post on facebook. A cameraman living in Tokyo made a film from footage off of a television station in Japan. In the footage you can see the water rising up from the street. The person filming is so close to the water, I am amazed that they didn't get swept away. The current is so strong that you can see it creep up and take away cars, a railing and buildings. It is astonishing and breathtaking how insane mother nature is.

Secret with of the Day: Get my travel fix in, with all the travel snacks.

Arg...

I feel so unproductive, unmotivated, and something else...

bla...that's what it is!

There is so much Brian and I have to do and this is how I feel.

I wont to get up and take care of my crap but I am also so discouraged.

So much to do and I feel like we are not going to get through it and get what we want.

I am not very happy with where we are right know.

I have so many things that I want to change!

I also have absolutely no idea were to start.

The really crappy part is that I kinda feel like I wont be able to get to where I wont to be.

Now I think it is safe to say that most of how I feel is in my own damn head.

But it is how I feel. So...

How do you know where to start?

The secret wish for today: to feel accomplished